Friday, July 23, 2010

What Does Your Free iPhone 4 Case Say About You?

I'm feeling a little saucy today - so here's the official (and very scientific) iPhone 4 Free Case Personality Analysis!

You probably know that Apple has offered to provide a free case to anyone who ordered an iPhone 4 before September 30th, 2010. In addition, Apple will be refunding Bumper purchases. To show what a nice guy he is, Steve Jobs is allowing customers to choose from not one, but six different cases from various vendors. I don't even want to know what these vendors had to agree to to get on Apple's list, but suffice it to say margins are probably slim to nil.

To get your free case, you must download the iPhone 4 Case Program from the App Store and sign in with your iTunes account information.

Here's what your selection tells the rest of the world about you:

Apple iPhone 4 Bumper - Black
Choosing this case tells the world you like to play it safe and go with what you know. Sure - Apple may have dropped the ball on the whole antenna thing - but you bought the iPhone 4 for a reason right? Stand by your man (or woman) and keep your shiny new toy brand-pure. Other ways to describe your personality might be boring, bland or dull.

Incase Snap Case for iPhone 4 - Smoke
Is the black iPhone 4 too shiny for you or do you have something to hide? Is that Apple logo too reflective in the sun or are you trying to avert prying eyes? Choosing this case means a life on the run, veiling your true intentions with falsehoods, misinformation and misdirection. If you haven't considered a career in the CIA now is the time.

Incase Snap Case for iPhone 4 - Clear
You wear your heard on your sleeve and aren't afraid to show it. Delving into deep personal topics and that precarious "TMI" zone comes naturally to you. Of course you also want to protect your heart from breaking - you just aren't very good at it. You may also be referred to as a "Stage 5 Clinger".

Belkin Shield Micra for iPhone 4 - Clear
Choosing this case displays a deep inner desire to have your cake and eat it too. Often accused of being emotionally distant, self-centered, selfish or sociopathic you want to get all the benefits of iPhone 4 protection without the commitment to sacrifice style and add bulk. Selecting this case increases the odds you will become a serial killer by 23%. It's science.

Griffin Motif iPhone 4 Diamonds/Smoke
Kim Kardashian would be proud of you for selecting this iPhone 4 case. Now you can display your Louis Vuitton knockoff style even when you aren't setting your obnoxious purse in the middle of the sushi bar for all to see. How is the chef supposed to serve you with that thing sitting there?

Griffin Reveal Etch iPhone 4 - Black/Black Graphite
Is your glass half full or half empty? If you choose this case you probably vacillate between the two while pondering the modern wing of your local museum. You also enjoy spending inordinate sums of money on things most people think came from a dumpster.

Speck Fitted Case iPhone 4 - Black Tartan
If you aren't British you wish you were. This patterned case oozes sophistication and nose-in-the-air superiority. In fact - it's the most stylish of all the free iPhone 4 cases. You might do well to remember what they say about the loudest person in the room...

Speck PixelSkin HD iPhone 4 - Black
As if having Pixel in the name of this case wasn't enough to sell you - they threw in "HD" just to make sure the inner (and probably outer) geek in you couldn't resist. Just like those weird people who wave when they see someone in the same model of car you'll know your nerd-kindred when you see someone whip this baby out from across the room. Since your severely introverted personality won't let you wave I hope they make an mIRC App soon.

What's your favorite free Apple iPhone 4 case? Which did you order?

Nick Kinports (follow him on Twitter @ADMAVEN) has worked in the interactive technology world for over 9 years, and helps the Fortune 100 identify unmet consumer needs, create ideas to fill those needs, and bring them into market. He currently works at Maddock Douglas.

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